Unrequited Love Relationships

Our Daily Walk with Christ – January 9, 2025

“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.” —John 3:16

The Spiritual Definition of Unrequited Love: “In a spiritual context, unrequited love refers to a one-sided, unreciprocated love that is given by God for humanity, but that love is not returned or acknowledged by the object of affection [humanity].

Are we certain that we are not in an unrequited love relationship with God? We have the assurance that God loves us, but what is our response to His love? We must love God beyond spoken words to receive eternal life. “LORD, I know that people’s lives are not their own; it is not for them to direct their steps” (Jeremiah 10:23).

Because God is Sovereign, He predetermined humanity’s appropriate response to receiving His love and salvation. We must serve Him with surrender and faithful obedience to demonstrate our love and loyalty. Our response of obedience is our highest form of worship and demonstrates reverence for Yahweh. Without obedience, we do not have a love relationship with Christ who is our Mediator between us and God, the Father.

An Unrequited Love Relationship Between Human Beings exists when Love is given to an individual who does not return the giver’s love.

“Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.” —1 John 4:7-8, NIV

Have you loved someone with everything you have and at some point, the person exhibited signs that they did not love you? When Christian believers experience this dilemma, it is a spiritual dilemma. We do not fall asleep one night and awaken the next morning not loving God and our family. The individual who verbalizes, “I just don’t love you anymore” has been disconnected from God for a while.

When the love of God ceases to exist, carnal feelings overpower and rule the heart, therefore the qualities of Christ-like love no longer exist in the hearts of spouses, the anticipated wedding is called off, and best friends part ways for no apparent reason.

If we cannot understand how Christians lose interest in the people who love them, it is an issue of the heart, they have lost interest in God. “The heart is deceitful above all things, And desperately wicked; Who can know it?” (Jeremiah 17:9). We must be intentional in maintaining our heart-to-heart connection with God. Without meaningful worship, the desire to serve God easily diminishes.

“You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.” —Jeremiah 29:13

We are impacted by our environment to seek success and to pursue whatever makes us happy. Without the power of the Holy Spirit, it doesn’t require much for us to embrace worldly practices. We cannot subdue our heart’s desires without the power of God. The once loyal believer transitions to an unbelieving believer [acknowledging God’s existence but no spiritual connection to God].

Sadly, the dissolution of marriages and long-term relationships has escalated in the Christian community. Many Instagram posts reveal the hurt and anger of spouses, fiancés, and friends who are attempting to move forward from experiencing the devastating heartbreak of unrequited love. Reading the emotional responses that arise from lost love is quite shocking, yet, even when suffering the greatest disappointment, as believers, we cannot justify possessing a heart overflowing with malice.

“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor [perpetual animosity, resentment, strife, fault-finding] and slander be put away from you, along with every kind of malice [all spitefulness, verbal abuse, malevolence].” —Ephesians 4:31, Amplified Bible

When our best is not appreciated, we feel devalued and grief easily escalates into anger, bitterness, resentment, and depression. Although we have immense love and devotion for God, even steadfast believers struggle with controlling the aftermath of roller coaster emotions from heartbreak.

The true challenge lies in maintaining a heart filled with love. Overcoming the escalation of carnal feelings requires much prayer asking for Divine strength. When love ends, we need Divine help to empower our self-control to resist plummeting into an abyss of dark emotions.

Nothing is hidden from God! “I, Yahweh, search the heart; I test the inmost being, Even to give to each man according to his ways, According to the fruit of his deeds” (Jeremiah 17:10).

Unrequited love hurts! We cannot deceive God who knows the true condition of our hearts. Pray an honest prayer of confession and forgiveness, “God, I am angry, hurt, resentful…” Forgive and pray for the person who failed to return your love and redirect your focus from yourself to God. Asking God to reveal His plan for moving forward keeps us connected in our time of emotional distress.

“I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:13).

“Be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you” (Ephesians 4:32). Acknowledging that you still love the person is a healthy response that prevents the entry of unforgiveness. Obeying the command to forgive is crucial because our character traits determine our destiny. God commands that we love and forgive those who hurt us. Pray! The Holy Spirit gives us the strength to love even when experiencing extreme emotional pain.

“He heals the brokenhearted And binds up their wounds [healing their pain and comforting their sorrow].” —Psalm 147:3, [Amplified Bible]

Love and Forgiveness are the spiritual catalysts to receive healing. Jesus asks, “…Will you be made whole?” (John 5:6). Thankfully, God promises to heal our broken hearts. We have a compassionate Heavenly Father who knows and understands the pain of a wounded heart. Surely, God endured heartbreak to see His Son on the cross and mocked and despised by those He came to save. Because emotional pain impacts our relationship with Jesus Christ, our spirit of forgiveness invites God to begin a journey of healing that includes receiving Jesus’ Divine Strength and Comfort.

“Come to me, all you that are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” —Matthew 11:28-29, NRSV

Do not allow yourself to become hard-hearted! It is better to cry a river of tears and express immense sorrow than to become bitter and resentful. All is not lost! God promises to heal and restore joy to our hearts. Our Loving Father is compassionate and kind. The duration of our journey of healing is determined by God who never requires us to hurry up and heal.

Pray as often as needed and study the Scriptures, especially the life of Christ. Ask God every day for the courage and strength to keep moving forward even when performing routine duties. The perplexities of emotional healing remain a mystery, yet, we know that faith and trust in God lightens the heavy burden of sorrow, and day by day, we become stronger through Christ.

“You, Lord, are forgiving and good, abounding in love to all who call to you.” —Psalm 86:5, NIV

Have you hurt someone? Believe that God loves you! The Holy Spirit speaks to our conscience when we have inflicted emotional, mental, or physical pain on others. Confession and repentance are vital to be in the right standing with God. Seek the forgiveness of those you have hurt. “To change, we must desire change, and surrender our hearts to God who changes us through the power of the Holy Spirit.”

Those who inflicted severe pain on their loved ones are still loved by God. Asking the person/people for forgiveness is the first step that God requires before we confess and repent [Matthew 5:23-24]. Yes, there are extenuating circumstances [court orders, deceased, or unknown location] that prevent one from contacting the person or people who suffered. Even so, with a contrite spirit, pray for forgiveness, and ask God to touch and heal the hearts of those who were impacted by your actions.

“Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead…” —Philippians 3:13

“And I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart.” —Ezekiel 36:26

Before Saul’s spiritual transformation to the apostle Paul, he was responsible for most of the deaths of the early Christian believers. The apostle Paul is proof that God redeems and restores. God used Paul to establish 14 churches and write most of the New Testament while imprisoned. We cannot carry a load of guilt. Move forward by praying for the Holy Spirit to transform your heart into one of unconditional love. God redeems and restarts our spiritual journey with the expectation that we will love as Christ and reflect His love to others.

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” —1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Because our perception of love varies, we must learn and practice God’s Righteous definition of love toward all people. We invite the Holy Spirit to teach us how to love, including loving those who reject us. We always forgive and pray for those practicing unrequited love, but we also exit the relationship or marriage if the spouse or friend refuses to restore their love relationship with God.

Agape love is the love that is the foundation of our heart-to-heart connection with God and imparts health and happiness to the giver and receiver. The Christian home is to be filled with love, joy, and peace. Unrequited love creates an environment void of love, causes suffering, fosters hate, and is not blessed by God. The atmosphere of our homes should reflect God’s love and peace which is needed to maintain a viable [thriving, growing daily] love relationship with Christ which is our priority.

“For I will restore you to health, And I will heal you of your wounds,’ declares Yahweh…” —Jeremiah 30:17

Our fractured earthly relationships may never be restored, but God keeps His promises. With joyful expectation, we exercise faith to believe our emotional wounds will be healed. Yeshua [Jesus] is the Spiritual Balm who heals us completely by giving us a new heart without residual scars and freeing us from all guilt and remorse. Yes and Amen, I am a living witness that God restores and heals broken hearts.

We are looking forward to the day when unrequited love relationships will not exist. But until then, we invite the Holy Spirit to flood our hearts with Agape love and move forward in faith. Our Savior’s earthly ministry focused on healing, which always required faith in God’s power, and today, Jesus says, “I have loved you with everlasting love, have faith in Me, and I will heal you.”

“And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.” —Revelation 21:4

Lord God, we thank You for being a healer of broken hearts. In Jesus’ Righteous Name, Amen.

Please share this Devotional with anyone who is impacted by an unrequited love relationship. Peace and Blessings.

© 2024 STEPS 2 Success with Spiritual Solutions Ministry